Erin Ropelato

Finding Joy in a Mixed-Faith Marriage

Kristen Smith’s Story of Healing, Faith, and Letting Go

What happens when the person you love the most no longer believes what you do?

That was the reality Kristen Smith faced just a few years into her marriage. A lifelong member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Kristen married in the faith but soon after, her husband quietly stepped away from church activity. What followed was over two decades of hurt, resentment, disconnection, and emotional distance.

In her episode of Divine Disruptors, Kristen shares how everything began to shift, not because her husband changed, but because she did.

Letting Go of Control and Finding Personal Joy

For years, Kristen believed that happiness in her marriage would come when her husband returned to church. She describes a common feeling that so many of us carry: “If they would just do what I do, everything would be fine.” But over time, that mindset led to frustration, unmet expectations, and emotional exhaustion.

The turning point came when Kristen realized it wasn’t her husband’s responsibility to bring her joy, it was her own.

“I had to stop relying on him for my happiness. I needed to find joy for myself, no matter what he believed.”

This mindset shift changed everything. She began to focus inward, choosing healing, curiosity, and open communication over control, fear, or judgment.

From Gut Health to Emotional Healing

Interestingly, Kristen’s personal transformation started physically. Years of poor nutrition and burnout had left her depleted. When she began focusing on gut health and energy, she found herself more emotionally regulated and suddenly had the capacity to deal with the deeper emotional work that had long been pushed aside.

Healing her body gave her clarity of mind. And clarity led to deeper spiritual reflection.

Kristen’s story is a powerful reminder that healing is whole. When we nourish our bodies, we’re more equipped to untangle what’s happening in our hearts.

Shifting from Judgment to Curiosity

As Kristen healed, she realized that many of her conversations with her husband and loved ones were laced with quiet judgment, even if she hadn’t meant them to be. She recalls thinking she was simply “teaching” or “inviting” others to do what was right. But over time, she could see that she was trying to control the outcome of someone else’s spiritual journey.

“I thought I wasn’t judging, but I was trying to control how others lived. That’s not love. That’s fear.”

Now, she leads with curiosity and love. Her relationships are stronger because of it, including with her husband, who still doesn’t attend church. And that’s okay.

Embracing Differences as Divine

One of the most powerful takeaways from Kristen’s story is her realization that we are not meant to all believe or behave the same way. Our differences don’t disqualify us from connection, in fact, they might be the exact thing that strengthens us.

“We’re all different for a reason. Even our testimonies will be different, and that’s okay. We each find God in our own way.”

Through years of open (and hard) conversations, Kristen and her husband have rebuilt a connection rooted in mutual respect. Their faith journeys look different but their love is stronger.

When You Stop Trying to Fix Others…

Kristen’s story is an invitation to let go. To stop managing other people’s spiritual lives. To trust God enough to do the work in them and focus on doing the work in ourselves.

Whether you’re in a mixed faith marriage, have a child on a different path, or simply struggle to understand someone you love… Kristen’s journey offers hope.

Because when you let go of control, you make space for peace. And peace is where healing begins.

Erin Ropelato

Finding Joy in a Mixed-Faith Marriage

Kristen Smith’s Story of Healing, Faith, and Letting Go

Letting Go of Control and Finding Personal Joy

From Gut Health to Emotional Healing

Shifting from Judgment to Curiosity

Embracing Differences as Divine

When You Stop Trying to Fix Others…

Catch more of Kristen's story on the Divine Disruptors YouTube series.

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